Why we shouldn’t judge people by their (home) appearance.
Being organised or not, de-cluttered or not, can be a hot topic. I see it discussed a fair bit in the IWM facebook group and luckily most people don’t judge or even post pics of their own ‘mess’ to make the OP feel better.
I personally think it doesn’t make the best dinner party conversation, because opinions and standards vary – and they should. It’s everyone’s life journey, including upbringing, which gets you to the place you are in right now. And circumstances change, and with that expectations should. I good part of my private consultations and public workshops revolve around conversations about that topic. We discuss the whole attitude we have towards our homes and our (overstated) expectations; mostly fueled by the media (and mother in laws!!! lol). Lifestyle shows have a lot to answer for: They do to our house image what supermodels do to our body image. We know it’s not real, but measure our self against these standards – but: Who wants to live on the set of Better Homes and Gardens? Colour coordinated throw cushion anyone?? Really????
Judy Batalion writes in this article about her journey and how her relationship with stuff impacted on her choice of how to live and with whom.
Have a read and think about whether you want stuff to make these decisions for you. Is it really that important? Is your life about stuff? Are you happy with this? Would you like more time to do ‘things’ and be with ‘people’, experience life and laugh?
Is your relationship to the materialistic things surrounding you your own, or did you ‘inherit’ it from your parents? Or are you 100% different from your parents, which is just as much external influence?
In an article in the Inner West Courier I was asked my opinion about the Japanese bestseller written by Marie Kondo, and my response is: everyone has their own relationship to their stuff; some people have a lot of things and live happily with them. It’s when it starts to impact on our life and our stress levels that we need to do something about it. But as much as your stuff journey is different from the person next door, so should your method of dealing with it. Not everyone is able to tackle all their oversupplies in one go – as Kondo suggests in her book ‘the live changing Magic of tidying up” (and by the way – we don’t tidy up, we de-clutter and organise). Not everyone has the time to fold their undies into neat little squares. It’s not wrong, but one size doesn’t fit all!!